Ok walking to car, 3 gay guys park get out of car, one on phone says 'I dont know but I was definately getting some curb rubbing'
Buying weed on Christmas. Gotta love Jewish drug dealers
The bong broke. we're having a little funeral followed by an inaugeration service for the new one
the new roommate knocked on my door this morning holding a bong in one hand and my dennys leftovers from last night in the other. love this kid. Best student housing placement ever.
It ended with me crying and eating pizza in my closet.
If she's steering anything, it's a religious boat of crazy. Destination: Iceberg.
if you didn' use the plastic sword on the cop. maybe this wouldn't have happened.
I'm taking a leave of absence and sending myself to fat camp. I'll let you know when I'm out.
He won't have sex to beyonce. I hate him.
After you puked in the bathtub you claimed you were never eating quesadillas again and you never even ate a quesadilla
All I have are vague memories of us eating ham?
You know that gay bartender? Not as gay as we thought.....
I forgot to lock the door last night. I woke up cuz a guy opened my bedroom door, asked me who I was and where he was. And there was another guy standing in the living room asking me if I knew what apartment "Travis" lives in.
my goldfish that i got the day i lost my virginity just died. im terrified as to what this symbolically means for my sex life
I refuse to shit my pants for anyone except Cher and Christina Aguilera!
Randomize