I woke up fully clothed on top of my sheets and i didnt even pee myself..so proud.
Besides Rainforest Cafe, there's nowhere i'd rather be intoxicated than here
He made me cum so much, I almost let him spend the night. The operative word being "almost".
Having him eat chocolate out of you is not as romantic as it sounds. I'm still finding pieces.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we were going to warn you, but we veto-ed that idea somewhere between "this is the stupidest thing we've ever done" and "let's order a pizza"
Well ya in hindsight obviously offering the cop a jello shot was a bad idea
My vagina just recognized that song.
I pulled my bra out of my dress and handed it to my mom..at cocktail hour during the wedding.
Liquid roulette time! Black Mystery Cups are filled with either ipecac, whiskey, or NyQuil. Let's have fun
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He just kept yelling cup my balls to everyone they kicked us out after 20 min
YOU CAN'T JUST DO COKE AND THEN CALM DOWN
I had wine for breakfast at 6am, that's how visiting my parents went.
Although can we find me a starter dick? I don't want security showing up again. That was awkward.
WHO GIVES HANDJOBS AT 8 IN THE FUCKING MORNING
they were drunk. and loud. and now they're drunk and quiet. or dead, you never know.
Randomize