so... my grandma just told me i should be a stripper
well at least shes not calling you fat anymore
where are you?
sonic
Good. I hungoveredly cleaned your room. This is what being married is going to be like. I pick the condoms up off the floor and you bring home the hot dogs.
Ok. Also I almost just threw up. Seriously. I was think to myself "really? Here? Now? At my work desk?" and then it went away.
She called all of my friends to find out where I was last night. 7 out of ten said their place.
the party has pretty much ended, it's just 20ish of us jumping and grinding to music from some guy's phone in the corner.
You leave me no choice. Your vagina is grounded. It can just sit there and think about what it's done.
I told him I had AIDS after he bit me. His dad cried. I think I just ruined the little guy's 3rd birthday, but he had in coming.
I got a dollar bill stuffed into my bra on two separate occasions by two separate guys simply for having boobs. I feel like somewhere god is patting himself on te back while pointing at me goin "you're welcome dude." easiest two bucks I ever made.
Ahh good point. I got some interesting mental pics and I'm slowly entering a "fuck it, lets do weird shit" phase sexually, but you may have already figured that out since I've been fucking you sideways and upside down a lot lately.
I didn't punch him it was just love coming out of my fist
You ripped my pants off and gave me the choice use it or lose it what was I suppose to do.
It was a blind-side dick pic.
Had an orgasm and got a charley horse at the same time. It was a multi-purpose scream.
My New Year's resolution consists of less weekday hangovers, more sex, and more money.
No. No. Fuck you! You can do your own grocery shopping.
Randomize
