just saw bouncers outside a coffee shop. beginning to question humanity.
Fact: The drinking you do in college doesn't affect your liver in real life.
Getting 10 cents back for every can is really just encouraging alcoholism.
You're so easy to please, it's adorable. Like an alcoholic puppy.
You're always adorable, but when you're drunk, you're like Chia Pet adorable.
I just found puke in my bra..
as they left, you opened the door, dropped your pants then yelled "don't leave, this is what you're missing"
She's in the middle of blacking out but is singing Mariah carey songs. Hitting every note.
I don't drink so I see St. Patty's as an LSD type of day. Its like a more hardcore 420
He was uncircumcised
It was like inception. A penis within a penis within a penis
Add caroling to the list of things we need to do in an elevator
Drunk Karaoke resulted in only 8 injuries this time, so there is some improvement.
New war strategy! The ex-girlfriend of my ex-girlfriend is now my twice a week booty call!
Well now you know... If you can get over the awkward... The dick is 10 min away.
I did crash a prom last night though.. It was fun
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