Her directions to the house party: "the north star will guide you, turn left. I'm wearing the potato hat"
I made a tournament bracket for the girls that Im talking with.
No, I don't not want an upside down piggyback ride. You're drunk and there are rocks.
Just bought a waterproof mattress cover. Bring it on sophomore year.
I think my multiple attempts of taking his life, no matter how unintentional they were, has put a damper on our friendship
Apparently he proposed after he saw me chug vodka out of a traffic cone.
I just watched a guy smoke weed through a French Horn. He is my hero
Here's the level of my committment: I'm not participating in the Olympic opening ceremonies drinking game. THIS IS SERIOUS.
I know my whole body feels like I belly flopped onto concrete. Seriously need to tone it down for a while
he played intl players anthem 4me and ate a strawberry out of my pussy
Something I can get at drive through, boobs out, don't want to get out of the car
I would really like it if you guys got out of my bush
I'm too horny to sleep. I need some violent sex to wind me down.
I need a rain check on breakfast. A frat boy said it was his dream to sleep with a MILF, I made his dream come true and he made me cum
There is no way I’m wasting 21 year old morning wood
I need dick so bad, I’m dressing sexy for the school pick up line and sports practices to entice a few of the DILFs
Randomize
