Def gonna have stinky sex sometime soon. GOT TO! she has eligible friends for you, as well.
Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
Coffee flavored vodka sounded like such a good idea at the time. Now i never want to drink coffee again.
He wants to be 'in an open relationship'. Fuck that. That's the online equivalent of letting him pee in a circle around me.
Either she got face surgery at midnight, or i need to stop drinking...
They're having chugging contests. With juice. Please get me out of Utah.
I just met the 30 percent of the population with an STD
so i just drove past a racoon and a kid on a long board... god i love 4am white castle runs
now that im off birth control, the world is a much scarier place
he actually managed to pick a girl up by telling her that her skirt was ugly and she didnt do a good job with her makeup. thats some seriously low selfesteem
His penis will pick the quickest route to vagina. it's like an biological onstar.
Kid sitting next to me smells like he slept in a dutch oven full of farts. Going to die.
I need to mount that unicorn and turn him into a full blown steed.
We're ordering chinese food so if you want to get on this obesity train answer me now.
If waffles and beer don't scream "fuck me!" then I don't know what else to do.
Randomize
