wouldve been great, if we lived in constant slow motion cause that shit lasted 30 seconds and half the time he was putting on the condom
So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
we'll penetrate his innocence with our dicks
I said I wanted my dignity back. He brought my thong to me after sharpie-ing "dignity" on the front. I'm not sure if I should me mad or impressed.
sorry can't. you know Saturday is the masturbating day for single sorority girls here.
well this is gonna sound really bad but we were fooling around on sandra's electrical wheelchair
that's right. bitches got laser pointers. let's fuck shit up
Invited the whole bar back to my place for an after party.....shit got real with everyone seeing dad drink moonshine like a champ.
Lets start a coed nudist frat/sorority. It would be amazing. Or just an orgy club. It would also be amazing
I just messaged a senior at Harvard and told him to 'tinder me softly'
Just so you know the unusual amount of skittles on your floor is entirely your own fault. You bought me 20 bags of them while I was high.
Going to the bathroom drunk while wearing overalls is such a struggle
Get ready tonight we are going to get drunk and pierce my nipples
MY MOM WALKED IN WHILE I WAS EATING THEM OUT AND STARTED ASKING US ABOUT THE PROJECT RUNWAY EPISODE WE WERE WATCHING EARLIER
Why is there a pair of panties on my front lawn?
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