Yeah, where have you been?
Clearly not facebooking enough. Sweet jesus.
They just both started mumbling "i cant go home like this" "it's all over my face" "do you have extra pants?"
We thought she was passed out on the toilet, but she raised her head to tell me the word I couldn't remember was "empathize." Then she puked blood and passed out.
I kept petting the scarves and telling customers to "feel that shit"
Stop drinking at work.
Post-shopping-cart-scooter-jousting victory fuck?
shit went down at the bar when this girl with 'morals' totally cock blocked a married guy. she actually kicked IN the bathroom door when they were fucking in there. then we all did shots.
Shirtless guy staggering down the sidewalk, puking into a Prada shopping bag. Ahhh, the walk of shame in Boystown.
I spent a lot of time in their kitchen cause I was convinced that the living room was gonna fall... Sorry for not warning you about that.
Told my brother the truth how I meet her...I grabbed the first thing I could when the cops came. 10 months later we are engaged.
I fully committed to my astronaut costume, to say the least. blacking out on moonshine and having a moonwalk of shame this morning: happy Halloweekend.
Sloppy and selfish. Your 27 and you don't know where my clit is? BYEEE
Do you think there are other mothers looking at porn in the carpool line?
if I blackout nd am found tomorrow w butterfly hairclips on my nipples and my habd down my pants tell my family I am sorry
Yeah she's a complete bitch. But I mostly hate her because she hijacked my fuck buddy.
I understand why animals eat their young in the wild after watching your kid this afternoon
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