Your face is a jimmy john
piano lessons. No girlfriend. What's up.
Thats a flattering suggestion doug but lets be clear NO you may not put your face in my vagina just because ur not charging me a cover. sorry.
He just left me a message saying he left the rest of the weed for me. Did i just get paid for sex? And if yes did i just get paid in drugs?
He asked if I wanted a dutch rudder. 1.) Who says that? 2.) How exactly does one do that with a girl?
We should tie ourselves together anytime there is any type of alcohol involved. It's the safest way. I either end up with freshmen or weird ex bfs. You end up with a large cowboy. This is not good for us
I'm lying here drinking water from a shot glass..moving is not an option right now
while she was riding me, she looked at me and said "this is why mom told me learning how to ride a horse would be important for my future"
Well Its not like I planned having my potato launcher explode and burn off my eyebrow and eye lashes.. I still have my right eyebrow can't u just be happy?
Mom just told me I need to start having sex.
The other day, he sent me a snapchat of his dick in the forest. He captioned it "nature nudes."
Our office went out together for the first time to celebrate the fact our coworker got fired.
Every time Brady gets sacked I cum a little...
That’s true love. If they recognize a chocolate mold of your anus.
the sex got boring after the first three hours
holy shit
Randomize
