He probably put up nude pics. He seems like that kind of guy.
They made my facebook status "I got my period!!!." Every guy I've had sex with at college liked it.
A girl just asked me to co-sign for her boob job because she didn't have enough credit built up. This is a first.
Just dominated the men's bathroom at work. Sounded like the intro of a death metal song.
He just made a mudslide using rubinoff and swiss miss packets. This can't end well....
Just threw the poptarts. Sgits boutta go Down. 1 liter of wine
Trust me man, I did not put any cookies down your pants when you slept.
Dude, you left ME alone in your house. With your fully-stocked wine cellar. Why would you do that to yourself?
He kept walking up to every girl at the party saying "Hi, I'm George Clooney. No I won't marry you." He left with three girls.
So hungover. Have a black eye from where I tried to brush my teeth and stabbed myself in the eye instead. Should make the performance review I was stress drinking about go so much better.
He just used the word frick. Is that a possible red flag?
Guy in my class today said, "I'm pretty sure you think about beer 95% of the time."
No, no... It was great. I feel like my liver took a vodka shower and washed it's hair with pabst
getting my period the day i moved was my bodies way of saying 'congratulations youre not leaving town with anybodies babies!'
I had more orgasms than hours of sleep this weekend. I’m going to keep him around a while
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