Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she can't stop having the shits.
Just tipped at a bar in cheerios. Suck it.
just smoked a blunt while listening to nsync. i now know what my childhood was missing.
the bouncer made me realize that puking in line does not get you in any faster
she just gave her compliments to the chief, at dennys
had to split buying plan b over two cards. I will no longer challenge people to get on my level
I'm bleeding from my lower lip, and I have bruises around my neck. It was just easier to say I got mugged.
you reached into a lemon drop to pull out a lemon of someone else's drink..
I managed to make myself a bowl of apple jacks, took one bite and had to stop eating them because they were making my brain wiggle. How was your comedown?
Idk I somehow continue to get laid by pulling my dick out and reciting the 3 world country orphan kid commercials
Nothings harder than putting on a frozen condom.. or should I say softer
If you go to Tinseltown tonight. First bathroom on the left, second stall. Avoid. It's still coming to terms with what I did to it.
If I had a dollar for every straight boy that questioned their sexuality because of me, I would live a comfortable middle-class life.
He said his fantasy involved both of us fucking while stuffed into the same overalls
He radiates elegant sexual dominance. I bet even his balls have pinstripes.
Randomize
