I GPSed you we're an hour and 14min away from each other
and it's going to stay that way
before i could say "i'm not that kind of girl", i was.
Just blew a perc off the traytable on my flight, spring break has begun!!
That's the last time you suggest we can get our tab wiped by out-drinking the bartender.
It was my card, so what do you care that you lost?
Is your card paying for my plan b?
Vegas should really enforce the buddy system because if not everyone is going to end up swimming during the water show in front of the Bellagio.
I'm doing the Macarena naked in my living room right now
I see you're taking unemployment seriously.
Ecstasy body chair massage shower sex fest this week?
Whenever I walk away from the group without saying anything, NEVER assume I'm just going to the bathroom.
Xanax and an ambien. And wine. I'm just waiting for mouth to mouth from some hot EMT. Sort of like the slutty girls version of sleeping beauty
My tuesday consisted of speaking to a federal agent for two hours and watching a roving band of gypsies jump over a fire until 2:30am
What are your plans?
Get picked up. Convince you to leave work. Smoke. Drink. Fly helicopters.
I think if my mom ever finds out about my nipple piercings I'll just be like "mom, tbh it's a sex thing"
She gave me a job then fed me cheesecake in bed. She's a keeper!
I wore my lizzie mcguire socks to the bar last night. Because that's how i get all the ladiez
I'm literally trying to cool beer down right now in my car by putting it on my floor and blasting cold air on it
Randomize
