i think i just puked on my phone
we live great lives
i found literally half of a double sided dildo in my shower. i guess someone went home happy.
I just dumped out my gym water bottle and filled it with white wine. This is the end.
I just undressed him with my eyes. And gave him a 10 inch penis. I hope its true.
don't worry about it. We passed around the "get jeff bail" can 10 min. After you left. We currently have around $400. May I say that people here at the dorms really love you.
Dude how did you get resin on my keyboard?
Sex last night was mind blowing. your wife is one lucky lady.
Just remember my house smells of thick cut bacon and I have a big dick.
Your first mistake was not throwing your beer at the RA and running
But I swear to god if I'm awkwardly there while you try to have sex with someone again I'm getting high with your dad
I'm sorry I keep having sex wth your friends. I'm done, for real. Unless cole is interested. Other than that, I'm done.
We got drunk, we had raw sex and we discussed about the showrunner change in Doctor Who, in that order.
If I die write a nice eulogy and bury me with my star wars bobbleheads
When the vodka monkeys are playing a drum solo in my skull tomorrow, remind me I tried to sterilize my body from the inside with titos
A legendary roster of degenerates has been assembled.
Randomize
