You flung your panties at that guy you liked with an accuracy that I have never seen before.
even after i explained my bobby knight costume the bartender still kicked me out for throwing the chair
You did not just nickname me "Nipples".
i saw like six of her guido cousins in the jersey shore trailer alone. her family is having a dinner party for the premiere tonight.
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Its that time of year where we just drink more instead of dressing warmer
he had a dikembe mutombo jersey on, was swatting peoples drinks out of their hand and wagging his finger in their face everytime he did it.
Too lazy to get out of my bed thats 2 feet away from you. Are you sure youre alright?
Don't ever give your dog some hamburger at midnight. Its impossible to enjoy a late night burger when your dog just threw it up all over your carpet. Gremlin rules work with dogs.
Question: would Brian be pissed if I brought his 17 year old sister as my date to the wedding?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You're lucky you got out when you did, about an hour later the girl in the Franzia box started wrestling everyone.
They gave me patron and potatoes I couldn't say no
He claimed he was the best ass eater of the south. He was right.
He just used the word frick. Is that a possible red flag?
listen i get youre a daddy dom but that doesnt give you a pass to make dad jokes
I was asked to be part of a mmf threesome. I think I'd rather stay home, watching Orange is the New Black and cuddle with my cat though
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