He kept asking me to take off my bra and I sat up so he could. He fumbled with it for a few minutes and when I sighed and went to undo it he goes, "Yeah, you got this."
I think my plan to not drink this week was just ruined by my mothers discovery of the chat function on facebook
Mustard is by no means a replacement for yellow wall paint
I told her she has a very organized vagina; somehow she took offense.
Her boyfriend was wrestling another girl. But, she said she was okay with it because she kept checking for boners--w the back of her hand like she was checking for a fever
I hope your lack of response means you're banging, not talking about her purity ring.
All I know is that either you or I told a black guy that he looked like usher and he was sexy and that is our confession
Know of anyone who would be interested in trading weed for meatballs?
Sunday is the day of rest.
As in, whatever liquor is left after last night, you have to drink the rest.
HES DOING PULLUPS BE STILL MY BEATING HEART
I'm going to pretend you don't watch My Little Pony and focus on your large cock. Kay? Don't bring it up again.
I'm using her Instagram as a way to know where in town she is so I can avoid her lol
He yanked my breathe right strip off in the middle of me riding him.
Mmm vodka always tastes better when i know i have work at 8am
You went on the date? His pickup line was I swear I'm not a serial killer and you went on the date???
Randomize
