Michael Jackson had a heart attack when he found out boyz to men was a music group not a delivery service.
i think i would be more confident if i were chinese.
I woke up at 2 pm to my roommate checking my pulse.
We hooked up with his aunt passed out next to us. It was just like old times.
It made me think of you cause he just screamed "CAPTAIN PLANET" a lot and kicked people in the balls.
Can we promise no matter what that we have sex the night the Mayan calendar runs out?
What's great about college is that i can eat chocolate cereal for every meal and call it a money saving technique.
bro, your right, i shouldn't feel embarrassed about taking shots from a penis-shaped ice sculpture
I'm really glad that we can be casual hook up buddies. This is a true friendship. Now, please convince your roommate to do the same. Thanks.
Do they mail horrible human being awards or do I have to pick it up or what's the protocol on that shit
Look, when i woke up this morning, I had every intention of being a responsible twenty-five year old, cleaning up, making my budget, and filing my taxes. Its just I got siderailed by pot and downloading classic Disney songs, because fuck adulthood; everyone loves Disney.
The house hit rave levels when La Bamba came on which confuses me because I live in white suburban Canada
PARA BAILAR LA BAMBA ASSHOLES
Tony's mom to him at breakfast: "I found the shirt you wore last night in the bushes this morning."
I also have bagel bites. I know that's not as big an incentive as the cocksucking but.....
How do u ask ur friend if shes keeping her kid but in a chill way
Randomize
