isnt it creepy that our bodies make people
I'm the only kid serving jury duty. And I'm the only one who may walk out of here in handcuffs for a warrant. I'm enabling these people to doubt America's youth once again.
Ita all starting to make sense i need vodka like i need air
Correct me if I'm wrong, but did you let me pee in the grass while barking? And also, how many of you have videos?
Four times in one night? That Energizer bunny outfit lived up to the hype.
Trial is expected to last a fucking week if I get chosen.
To be fair, you are the kind of person I want to be on the jury when I inevitably end up in front of one.
I'm just crazy horny about you
I want this pizza in and around my mouth forever..
Just saw the guy I slept with last night in a bar. He gave me a high five and kept moving
Plus it's a good way to scope out guys. Have them fight for you, like real males do in nature.
I was so high I started singing Let It Go and then instantly started laughing 'cause I was eating ice. Everyone just stared.
Somehow I just turned an entire McDonald's bag upside down in my car and not a single fry fell out. The Lord really does work in mysterious ways.
Let's take a shot for every time we've said "I don't want to get that drunk tonight"
Is it bad that I like to have a guy to flirt with in every class? I feel like it's excellent motivation: to shave, to shower and to show up.
Sexual side note: sushi and cum do not mix well. That is all.
Randomize
