I love him more than I love myself. Which is a lot...Because I'm narcissistic.
her boobs were like sundried tomatoes..
Im already sauced. Have been for hours. Its kinda my thing.
jersey shore has given me a vivid depiction of what things will be like for me once i get to hell
my dad is drunk dialing our relatives who are stuck in a blizzard asking them to pick up sun tan lotion for him cause hes too drunk to drive to the store.
fter the third song from an iPod commercial played I realized how much that frat sucked.
my mom found all the used condoms in my bed side table
whatd she say to you?
no words- put them all in a circle, put the bible in the middle
just served this dwarf dude an entire pitcher of malt liquor. watching this will totally be worth my bartender's certification.
She called to say she's single and blow job season is back.
You fought the bouncer and lost, then challenged a hobo to a 40 chugging contest and lost. Sobriety is a good life choice.
Please don't smoke the bong in the bathroom while you shit. It is not a shitting bong.
We now only communicate via Xbox messages. Living together is so easy
I'm going to miss hockey season. It was the best excuse to get drunk on a Tuesday night.
How about we just have a naked taco night instead?
So what other shows do you masturbate to? Or is it just friends
Randomize
