dude u gotta turn down the techno when u bang that chick its creepy
i can't believe you bought a jetta. you know that's a girl car, right? if i hadn't had sex with you, i'd have no other proof you're straight.
I just saw a Puerto Rican child between the ages of 8 and 11 with a faint mustache talking very loudly on the bluetooth in his ear about how "Skittles are played the fuck out"
she's in the bathroom. spitting in the trashcan. not throwing up. just spitting and singing bad romance by lady gaga.
thatta girl
There is a distinct lack of front teeth here.
And to think..we used to do everything sober...
Someone just proposed in Subway. Trying not to laugh.
Puked up what appears to be battery acid next to the treadmill. Everyone noticed.
Can you tell me how this chicken finger got in my pillow case?
We were thinking he might be gay. Like how the fuck do you not even make out with a girl that made you a grilled cheese
I cried and ate like 6 tacos in the taco bell parking lot at almost midnight, sober, alone, listening to a demi lavato cd. And that was the good part.
Its not gay if you're best friends and there's less than an inch of dick in the picture. That's where the line is drawn
I'LL COME GET YOU. GOTTA FIND A SUIT THAT COVERS TIT BRUISES FIRST.
Stop it. You know what r&b does to my body
He kept trying to make out with me but I was just trying to show him Shrek memes
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