sounds like you fell off the wagon.
fuck falling off. at this point, the wagon is a dot on the horizon.
I'm not 100% on this, but I'm pretty sure I just accidently talked my way into a threesome.
Drinking bud light and eating rice cakes...this is the closest to getting in shape for spring break as its going to get.
also, did you notice that when he quoted your email he used MLA format?
He handled me like a finger puppet on crack... Time to ice the vagina, I'd like to sit down sometime today.
I vaguely remember stopping for a bag of bugles and some lube and then I woke up this morning with melted chocolate on my hands. I think I love him
Well watching will be involved...it'll just most likely be of me licking your penis instead of me trying to understand how Hans Solo goes up against the Galactic Empire...
I'm 50% okay with that amount of body contact... plus/minus 7% based on where blood may flow.
i have a raging boner for Saturday, day drinking is one of my top favorite things right next to alligator wrestling and blowing shit up
Brett got me a cake with a pic of me shitting
He just stays over and makes naked pancakes in the morning
Dude, I'm thinking today is Single as Fuck Friday because that's how I'm feeling
Stop calling me, Mom. I'm in his closet. You're gonna blow my cover and I'm about to catch this lying SOB.
Just reached for my phone in my non existant pocket while it was in my hand.
he was really really nice, and I did coke off of his dong that night too
Randomize
