Tell her she can't have a vagina
how was the sex?
he smelled like pickles and burnt hair.
well, there's that.
Capitaan dildo arrescate!
This girl wants me to lick her pits
pits??
Yeah pits, I think I still go for it though
Our professor just said "No class today, go get stoned." A guy seriously walked over and hugged him.
It was an igloo shaped doghouse, I was obligated to hotbox it
I puked in the coffee maker. I wouldn't make coffee tomorrow morning if I were you
Yeah, all the sudden I heard a loud "ding" and realized I had been passed out on the dorm elevator for about an hour....
She just rubbed her face all over pool chalk. I feel like it's time to go
I wonder what it's like for my roommate to live bicuriously thro my sex life
You grabbed my shirt and said, "hope you're not attached" and ripped it off before I could answer you.
I would've fucked Winston Churchill - rode that D like I was going into battle.
You like that 95% of the time I masterbate I think bout you?
Just wanna know what I can I do to earn the other 5%
I mean, it's good for a lot of things. Just not the inside of your vagina
Well neither is bbq sauce but I dont judge kinks
I forget how to act sober
Randomize
