im pretty sure i tried to attack the vending machine last night
lol who won
well im in the hospital right now so u tell me
Your brother just successfully got half the bar mostly naked
last night i found out that about 5 of my friends audio recorded us having sex through the bedroom door, then auto tuned it in the tpain app on his iphone.
I found my underwear on the sidewalk 8 blocks from her house while on my walk of shame. I also found our beer bag and a full beer in the bush.
Dude if our hands were ladels we could work at a soup kitchen
That would be so convenient
Do you know what's great about Canada?..... There will always be a Tim Hortons on my walk of shame route
isn't that the guy who always buys you drinks?
yeah. i love a man who still buys me drinks after the bar cuts me off.
next time on intervention
so far, I've observed him try to hit on 3 girls, 1 guy and a bar stool. Humanity is amazing from a sober point of view.
bro, your right, i shouldn't feel embarrassed about taking shots from a penis-shaped ice sculpture
I have a theory that years from now they will be with women who despise me because of what I trained their husbands to like.
YOU KNOW BRAZILIAN BOYS ARE MY WEAKNESS
I hooked up with a guy named Quan.. I literally hit the Quan
When your guy changes his swinger profile to include you. #makingprogress
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
Yes please. My parents would fucking love him and I'd love fucking him. That's a win-win if I've ever seen one.
Randomize
