I just googled how to quit your job and cause a big uproar at the same time....i tell you how tomorrow goes, i'm so excited....
Ah why did you tell everyone you dragged your sac across my face!
Did you see the soccer ref give that girl the red card as she was being kicked out of the party?
that girl is introducing herself into your group of friends one dick at a time.
i was getting a blow-job tonight in the mens bathroom of a bar and the bouncer comes in and says "bro i don't mean to cock block but you cant do that here."
Giving the kids Children's Claritin and calling it candy.....Is it setting them up for drug abuse later?
Oddly enough when I decided to stop whoreing myself out... I lost most of my companionship.
A-plus on my thesis. I deserve the blowjob to end all blowjobs. And I wanna wear a crown while you do it.
Seriously. All i can say is im covered in mud, my jaw hurts, i cannot straighten my arm, egg is everywhere, and there is a dead squirrel.
He either works for the Irish Mob or I'm being Catfished
please come here right now, that girl who always gets her boob out is here and she brought taco bell
The sorting hat of life was not kind to you.....
The modern romantic, surprising his gf w/ a gram of blow
Blacking out in the security line at the airport is not nearly as fun as blacking out in the lunch line at the dining hall.
What better than a girl who loves jager, sexts like a champ and is down for t-bell at any hours of the night? oh wait, NOTHING.
Randomize
