Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
Just learned how to deliver a baby.the things i saw tonight can never be unseen
Is it bad that we're talking like nothing happened?
Ah. Blossoming love after wild blackout drunk sex.
i'm sitting pantsless eating potato chips and watching porn before he picks me up for our date. I hope he's ready for this...
only clue right now is the orange grease all on my clothes. debit card denied so I know something weird went down..
I feel like "stop licking my face" isn't something that needs to be repeated twice
dude when im high using logic is an accomplishment that should be rewarded. make sure u get cinnamon twists
I have a rage boner right now. An actual erection brought on by the amount of sheer hatred I have towards nationwide.
I'm beer bonging chocolate fondue. That's how my Valentines Day is going.
Good. Sleepy. In the middle of a pregnancy scare. The usual.
Just checking to make sure you weren't kidnapped, pregnant or watching Fox News.
I'm kinda glad you won't be in Vegas tomorrow because you'd make us go streaking or throw dead animals at them.
I have a hickey in my new work ID photo.....
I'm praying to the gods of sex we both get laid this weekend. Amen. Love you
You ate all the burritos in sight....I cant take you to mexican restaurants anymore
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