Kelly went into her room with Dave, but is moaning Tommy...
HE had a tribal tattoo tramp stamp, jasmine.
You sprayed lemon pledge on your crotch because it was "dusty"
I had sex with her because I didn't want to hurt her feelings.. You're the one who told me I should be more sensitive.
Coming home soaking wet at three am and trying to convince the front desk man that we came from the library might have worked if I wasn't also roaring at everything.
going to class with no bra.. is that saying "i don't give a fuck i'm one hour away from thanksgiving break?"
I met her at the liquor store. I hope I'm wearing a condom
When I was in the bathroom and wiped with a paper towel I found in the trashcan, I realized that this might be the reason I have a yeast infection.
scarred for life. way too high and witnessed some chick give a dude head on the dance floor
Woke up with a text saying "when I get to see them titties again lil ma??" With 8 beads around my neck & an empty bottle of vodka in my arms.
I am the girl who goes to bed with her make-up on so that she doesn't have to fully redo it in the morning. I am obviously not ready to be a mother.
How does that even work?
How drunk do you guys plan on getting?
We wrote our addresses on our arms for the cab driver, what do you think?
Is it weird to invite your FWB to thanksgiving dinner??
I just saw a guy in a zippo shirt buy 2 gallons of fire starter fluid and then proceed to smoke a cigarette. I feel like hes got some big plans for his tuesday.
Stop inviting Kevin over. The dickless wonder started playing some strange Sci-FY music and speaking an alien language and the girls split.
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