Whatever it was. it was pregnant.
He looks like the kind of guy that still collects pokemon cards
I was found on the hood of someone elses car... Who would've thought there were 2 white nissans?
I'm telling you the guy came in bought a box of condoms and all three of the chicks that came in behind him followed him to his car. I want his life
If we get out of this alive, I'm never going to a Denny's at 3 am again.
Okay I woke up in my room, snuggie on, had a water bottle in my hand my tv was on Disney channel and my cigarettes are gone. And I deleted every text in my phone but one that said 'you are absolutely welcome'
it's ok. you also told me I can feel free to vomit on your blow dryer sometime.
we made out at a charity event. really i was helping the fight against aids...
No i'm not calming down the girl at white castle did not need to see the picture of my dick on your phone.
No, they seem attractive after SIX beers, after three they're just the gender you're looking for.
She deserves a chance to suck my penis. This is America. Its her God given right.
look for me at the Giants game I will possibly be the drunk girl passed out by 2nd
I love how encouraging you are, but I need you to stop me when the guy I'm going home with is a dead ringer for Nick Cage.
I got arrested in a leprechaun onesie
Is there a sexuality term for 'only wants hatefucks'?
Randomize
