Kiss
Puke
Dude judst bought snd smokked tfour white widoew jointsd in Asmsterdam. Wstching the Cvhiefs gsme. Oh Boy.
You are why other countries hate Americans. But I say God bless you.
No, we just ended up walking around in his pool high and singing songs by The Wiggles.
So my teacher figured out I made a drinking game out of her lecture. Once my drink was gone she let us out. Happy St. Patricks day class. Your welcome
That haircut screams I'm 35 but I still eat pussy.
We were having sex and his high flatmates stood outside his room playing the guitar and singing Somebody to Love by Justin Beiber. Weirdest night ever.
"I gave a guy a handjob last night, on a dog bed, inside a fireplace. It's going to be a good year."
stop sending me battleship coordinates and get back here so i can suck your dick
You should just construct a mini-city, actually. Then destroy, photograph and post. Who could turn down a dick that conquered a whole city? Craigslist personals wont know what hit it.
It's dollar drink night and I have my honors society initiation tomorrow. Somehow I think this will not end well.
Money making scheme, blow job proof mascara. Waterproof is bullshit
he was wearing a widestriped red gingham suit jacket with complete sincerity im not surprised she beat the shit out of him
you are singlehandedly the most cursed object the universe ever conceived
Sunburned by dick at the nude beach. Bad. She tried to blow me. But. I. Just. Can't. Saddest day of my life.
I just tried to lit a bowl with my chapstick.
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