can a staight man not wear seersucker in this town?
Its officially tradition: I black out every year on michael jackson's death day..
He compared my vagina to the first time he tried cocaine
I'm going to make an art book filled with pics of me peeing in every bar bathroom I've ever been in. Dedicating it to you. You're welcome.
ugh he was not leaving in the morning so i tried to scare him by crying and saying i wasnt ready to lose my virginity.
if creating a fake 8 year old brother, who lives with me and has had mono for the past month, to explain why I have ignored my group project members is wrong, then I... well then I'm probably going to hell
Even though he was watching you pee on his bedroom floor, you kept denying it and saying he was dreaming
I didnt think the feeling of accomplishment for fucking brothers would be this great.
say penis size is all related to how funny you are and then tell a feminist joke. if she laughs, you got double points, if she slaps you, she probably wasn't going to sleep with you anyway
Dude where are you? I've been here an hour and all I've done is get head from a random in the stairwell.
I REMEMBER NUGGETS BEING THERE BUT WE WERE AT A TACO BELL
Do you think this 2 hour Amazon delivery thing works on vibrators? Cause that would be clutch
you bleached my bangs. i have an interview later today and you assholes bleached my bangs.
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
im having flashbacks to my time in a waffle cult composed of 9 to 14 year olds
Randomize