I hid a 6pack in the microwave for later
I knew I liked you
I like daylight savings. I don't care if it's 4 oclock it's not daydrinking if it's dark out
seek help.
my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
his semen tasted like maple syrup. no wonder fat girls always wanna fuck him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Playing hide and seek with all those cheeseburgers... Not our finest moment.
im so proud of her that she got shit faced finally. This must be what it feels like to see you kids get their diploma or some shit.
by the way whatever wisdom you imparted upon me last night was lost to whatever i smoked out of a beer can.
If I end up in a healthy relationship because of this, I will NEVER forgive you!!!
I could run a drunk marathon in heels
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude, for twins they have shockingly different blowjob styles.
STOP FUCKING MY SISTERS!!!!
was it wrong to tell him he's welcome in my pants any time?
I'm a grown ass woman. Treat me like one. Fuckboy
I'm basically the yoda of knowing when someone wants to sleep with you
She just. Cock slapped me. With string cheese.
Flight got cancelled. Stayed in the same hotel as the flight crew so now I can cross Sex with Pilot off the bucket list
He regularly flies into DC, so I’m going to sign him up for my Frequent Flyer program!
Randomize