why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
At Coney Island the sign for the rollercoaster The Cyclone says, "Make sure your glasses and weave are secure."
I woke with a ring of glitter around my dick.... I kinda don't want to wash it off
Grandma was not a fan of the beer-can ornaments. Not "traditional".
he wanted me to put the condom on for him. I was high and couldn't figure it out.. so instead we played xbox.
Please tell me why 'cock-a-thon' was auto saved in my phone.
Dude it was a mini horse. It obviously only eats mini things.
I don't know what I wash first. My body or my puke painted car. People are judging me as I drive by.
You disappeared for an hour and showed back up with handfuls of bratwursts and yelled at my girlfriend that if she didn't eat them, that the nazis win
He kept checkin to make sure you were still alive after you passed out on his bed, After like the 4th time he walked back in there you were naked on his bed eating an apple, claiming he needed to be the Adam to your Eve..That drunk..
We found her on the doorstep. Just layin down going, "I made it home!! Aren't you proud??!"
I just saw a herd of slutty loofahs run down the street...
Brandon just showed up at my place with a florida state cheerleader he met in vegas durin spring break. His life is a fucking movie
The guy I brought home last night made a speedy escape while I was in the bathroom. The only trace I found of his flight was a lone sock on the stairs.... It was like a whorey low budget Cinderella
Heyyyy, naked guy in your kitchen, can i ask you a quick question about a legal situation in pb??
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