okay pat passed out under dana's car
I know I am usually the slut but tonight it's her. She is being a slut, yes slut, T as in Tomorrow, U as in Uterus, L as in Llama and S as in Sangria. That spells slut, but backwards and that's what she is being.
She looked at me and said there is a 90% chance I am going to puke in the next 10 minutes. 10 minutes later she is in jack in the box throwing up. She has amazing timing.
You walked in, sat down, looked at the waiter and said, "I'm only having deserts and liquor."
Yeah but I get laid and I know. He drank toilet water last night and he doesn't know about that either. Still makes me happy though.
He pulled a condom out of his satchel and i questioned my entire life.
I'm having one of my monday morning walk of shame coffees if you care to join.
Well when I got home you were sitting at the table eating cold, leftover taco meat. I'd say you were pretty far gone by that time.
She looks well worn, presumably from a cavalcade of penis.
I have fence marks all over my body
But forealz I'm gonna need a solid 52 orgasms so hydrate.
Nothing like waking up and having two guys who aren't your boyfriend talk to you about their hard dicks before 9 am.
I'm not in bed, I'm driving and puking at the same time.... first for everything
Is it okay that we fucked on my car hood, in his driveway, at 4 am with cars passing by ?
I dont even know what happened i just remember waking up with beer cans outlining my body...
Randomize
