I just rolled a spliff on a dora the explorer tv tray. Preschool education meet afterschool special.
Soooo billy mays was on coke. I'm about as shocked as I was when Clay Aiken came out
My stomach is making the worst sounds, probably because there is nothing but semen in it.
OMFG BINX FROM HOCUS POCUS IS MCGEE IN NCIS!!!!!!!! most. epic. realization. ever.
I thought we agreed I wasn't a screamer?
I was arrested last night for attempting to flee and elude. I wasn't really trying to run from the police. I was drunk and lost in the woods. I thought it was pretty obvious when I was waving at them from my puddle of puke that I wasn't really hiding.
i'm going to look back at this as the time of my life when i casually dated that autistic guy
Heed the warning of the ghost of Oktoberfest present: German beer is soooooooo much better than our watered down children's piss. also lost all my clothes and am wearing lederhosen the rest of the trip.
Beer vodka and pink lemonade powder mixed together. So. Many. Penises. My vagina will be calling out to them tonight. Coooooooooooooome.
second attempt at shower sex: failed after the water turned orange bc of a fire up the street. this is just not meant to be
He told me that his favorite part about me is hearing my voice while we fuck. I think that was the nicest thing he has EVER said to me.
We should give each other good-luck-on-your-finals head in the morning.
I burned myself with a joint twice in one sitting I have to say that's a new record for the least number of times I have hurt myself while smoking.
Jus pulled over and stole. Corn out of a. Field. ... get on my level
I forgot that I'm high because of how high I am.
Randomize
