i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
At this point, I would light birthday candles in my vagina for free drinks
Just got back from doctors appt. He lied. It wasn't a pimple on his dick.
I am more sore today than I was after my car wreck. Take it as a compliment that you bang harder than a semi-truck.
We woke up in an inflatable kiddie pool full of both empty and full beer cans. In the middle of his dad's office. Oh, and we were locked in. Nobody remembers.
Im celebrating the fact that the one guy who has ever denied me has just come out of the closet
I woke up naked in his kitchen...His name is Mike and we're having a "what happened last night" beer.
Had sex and ran 2.8 miles all before 7:30am. This is going to be a very productive Monday.
Dude if her licking my face hammered isn't love I don't really want to know what love is.
Thats Poetry
This Alex the guy who suck your belly ring
I spent the money she owed me on enough magnum condoms to make a blimp. Damn right I'm going to make the best of it.
Less than a month to go... I do not understand how I was able to put up with a roommate who wears bright green Crocs for a year.
I thanked him for the booty call offer but told him I'd rather just do it myself
Dude, she was there with her husband and I was there with my wife. Of course we banged in the bathroom.
Just find a separated / divorcing man. They’re too upset to fall in love, too helpless to be alone and too horny to think straight. Smile at him the right way and he’ll be thrilled to be with a sexy younger woman!
Randomize
