just sold my soul for a pack of cigaroos. little do they know they got the short end of the deal. suckers.
Pretty sure she's used to bigger guys. She kept slipping off while on top. like, constantly
I just found a beer pong ball in my mail box. I think its a sign
Aside from the slim chance of pregnancy, I'm gonna call last night a raging success.
I literally just wiped coffee off of the corner of my mouth with my boob because my hands were full. Thought youd be proud. Good morning!
I'm figuring, since someone shoved pizza crust in my ear last night, there might be some leftover pizza.
I gave the naked guy in the hotel a pop tart. He stopped crying.
I was busy. But now I'm about to consume alcohol and chicken. We shall see where this takes us. Maybe to the moon, maybe to the floor. I have no idea.
Also, I'm going to TRY and be casual this weekend, but really, we need to be serious about equally dividing our time between party and bullshit.
It's always a good night until the penis tattoo makes an appearance
You were great dude. You wanted to charge the guy with fedora $100 to get in.
Come to find out, there is a place where binge drinking and aggressive head butting is completely appropriate. In a mosh pit, Travis is just a regular dude!
Ya. My thumbs are those buffalo's, but my legs are spirits and my torso is that Indian guys and my head is the eagle
she wanted me to tie her up with my playstation charger cord. i kept on hoping she wasn't a squirter. those cords r expensive. could have def been a Sony commercial tho
I smell like a brewery and I have been drinking for 7 hours. This seems like a perfect time to tell my husband I want a divorce.
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