who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
I swear if I see one more guy in a v-neck and fedora I'm going to punch someone in the balls. This is philly, you're not supposed to look like Ryan Cabrera
I think the recipie for awesome sauce is butter and semen
...that's why he's not doing anything with his life except breeding geckos
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Having a race with the dryer. Seeing who can get drunk/dry clothes faster.
Hangover Status: I've been bedridden longer than that kid from The Secret Garden. It's not looking good.
Her only article of clothing is an American Flag
The topic of sex in the jamba banana suit has come up on multiple occasions. We're just waiting for a moment to try it out.
And then after we fucked he wouldn't stop calling me "champ". It was like I had sex with an extremely attractive soccer coach
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
so today, i decided to say "fuck it" to mental stability, take a klonopin and wear a blanket toga. New Girl is on Netflix, nothing could go wrong.
I just hit your bf in the face with a mustard bottle and the guy at the table next to us bowed down to me.
I'll screw just about anything, but I draw the line there
You told me that you would let her eat cake off of your ass, then fell asleep on the floor
passed out on bart again and decide to bike home. biked thru a goat farm of angry goats, biked on the freeway, got stopped by the cops, and sat shotgun in the squad car while the officer driving got a video on his iphone of his partner riding my bike on the freeway.
You need to get a passport so we can carry our bad decisions over the border
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