Yes give me all the cream and he's gone
Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
note to self..putting cheap vodka in a bottle of grey goose does not make it taste better
i lose more brain cells when ever she opens her mouth then i would doing meth for 8 years of my life.
The last thing i remember is saying breakfast beer and carrying the keg to my room and locking the door.
If I'm gonna go to jail I'm gonna be wearing a poncho
When the question of, do you know who's ass has been on the cake you are eating is said... Good or bad party?
I swear 95% of pictures on my phone are from drunken nights I don't remember with me doing a peace sign alone in somebody's bedroom.
It was a great idea until we got stuck in a ditch. We had to call redneck cousin 1
The gas station was closed so we found old PBR and played Edward Nalgene Hands instead
He's going to find out eventually, but really what's he going to do? Cry about it and buy another fucking kitten??
I FUCKED THE WRONG FRIEND HELP ME
When i said you could use my car and have sex in the back....i wasn't being serious.
idk how many shots you took between 2:39 and 3:05, but your message went from "Please text me tomorrow." to "Why you sto textom?"
I hope no one at work can tell or smell that I have tequila in my hair and I haven't showered for days
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