could you grab mr moo while you're at his apt?
you brought your stuffed animal to a booty call?
I really love her but I don't think I can go the rest of my life without anal.
it was like his penis was on wheels.
I just jerked it so loud the neighbor banged on their floor. maybe my wife got the point
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She wouldn't go home with me cause I forgot her name. I didn't realize it would matter after she danced with her vagina on my face
My cousin had a baby so we have to look at it. Apparently the event is byob
just explained the breakup in detail to my big toes. that consolation brownie was Amazing.
The sorority chicks were the Persian army, and we were their 300 Spartans. Can barely stand up now...such a good ratio
So far in the last ten minutes I have tried to pour cereal into a plate. Today's gonna be a great day.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've decided that it's a bad thing. But I've also decided that I don't give a fuck.
Now with the essential back story, I can empathize. Sorry about your beer and butthole.
Remember when we made out in a Chik-Fil-A drive thru?
I can say with absolute certainty the only time we ever had a civil conversation was when we agreed we both liked pizza.
The guy I slept with in AZ just called and is moving here next week.
I've never sung with balls in my mouth
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