Oral text is very safe with the right protection.
I just came up with the perfect plan. Once i'm a dentist i'm going to offer dad a million dollars to divorce mom.
Woke up naked in another mans house. If that keeps happening, then I probably need to go gay. You know to make it ok.
if he wont fuck me on the stairamster then i dont think theres much XXX shit going down
It's like split custody, only he's not a kid and they have sex with him.
I will start puting down the plastic for the vom in our love chamber. If you want to be something or someone else for the night feel free. The theme is shit show.
I'm there.
I'm smoking a bowl and pondering why we haven't discovered teleportation again.
We should probably go now, otherwise the whores will descend.
I'm a wonderful, drunk angel of hydration and sometimes absinthe.
It's like your tits told gravity 'fuck you, I'm fine right here!'
I wore heels to a golf store in hopes of getting laid. I've hit a new all time low.
Also, if you don't fuck me soon, I will die. I don't want to die like that.
I know it's wrong but I'm human. Now get over here, tie me up, feed me pizza and Fuck the crazy out of me. Please.
I offer naked tickle fights and orgasms and you call it trouble. I call that Christmas.
I don't wanna be 33 that's when Jesus died
Randomize
