I spilled a beer on myself, so I went back to my place to change. The city marshall was at my door with a warrant. That beer cost me 760 bucks.
He fucking owes me dinner after I gave him head under the deck behind the bar.
Just walked pass a bum on the way to a coinstar... awkward
so after the bed broke we walked out of the room to a standing ovation
I just had to tell her that no she really doesnt need to sneak pizza from mcmurrays out in a plastic bag for me later
Just been one of those weeks where alcohol out weighs friendship
Ugh. This is the type of hangover that all other hangovers want to grow up to be.
Indoor beer darts at Rafs just turned into a trust exercise of putting your hand on the wall and closing your eyes while the other throws.. Almost gave Cale a Tracheotomy
I consented to having my finger branded. How was your night?
I'm really stoned in my underwear. I probably won't make it to the bar.
Needless to say, I woke up on the bathroom floor wearing the dress that my mom wore to the wedding. That open bar stole my soul.
My body is telling me there was tequila. My pictures say it was Jeff's fault
Yeah. We're taking this fuck buddy relationship to the next level. Sober weekday sex.
I am still worried she'll have a seizure durring. What would I do? Try to ride it out and finish, or pull out and assist?
we decided to take the jello everclear shot at the party...didnt think it tasted any different....o dear god...the regret..
Randomize
