uhhh i just had a guy tell me he's seen more jam bands and done more drugs than i could err imagine. what a turn on.
Came home to a chalk baord that read:" Think like a rapist." Can't say I'm surpirsed.
Dan just whipped out his wang to piss in a milk jug! Hello weekend.
you were so high you were expressing yourself in action figures
I just found out I was conceived in a rehab facility... that's better than finding out your dad could be someone else right?
I just woke up eating some beef jerky with my cat. I think she opened the bag for us.
I'm in the sex attic, crying, eating french toast and taco
I was just hoping for a dick worthy of his established age.
Abort mission; I repeat: Abort mission.I found an attractive one.
Im hitting on this chick at a stoplight when all the sudden. i notice this chick blowing some dude in the backseat.
My car windows are covered in lube. Happy 4th of July!
I no longer need a flask. I need a canteen.
Guy just walked in with a 40 and a Honda steering wheel. Where the fuck am I?
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
FYI brushing your teeth & taking off your makeup does not erase the shame from the night before
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