But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
As long as they suck a good dick I don't care what fruit they have and where they have it
I woke with a ring of glitter around my dick.... I kinda don't want to wash it off
I woke up at 2 in my clothes with a defrosted steak in my pocket, no drinky this week at all.
Went to the doctors. She saw my " I love beer" tattoo. All she said was " My drunken tat is of just one word. "Cornnuts.". Then said Mexico was "awesome." And sent me on my way. Yeah. She's my favorite doctor.
The cab driver referred to me as his little gumdrop, im sure he won't feel the same when he sees the vomit all over his floor.
you should give me head with plastic fangs in
The family from the blindsided came and talked to us last night. The dad owns 68 taco bells. You would have been so inspired
omg he fucking fingered me this morning. and i was just like this is the most awkward alarm clock ive ever had
She suggested that I come visit her in Europe and hook up with the heteroflexible Korean who sits next to her in class. Polylove is the best love.
I know. It's cray. Crayon. Crayolaaaaa.
Jsyk, in serious talks of trading blowjobs for soup in bed. I'm sober
This time last year, you were undressing me from my gecko costume and getting freaky in a public bathroom. Tough to top that New Years Eve.
Goat in kitchen.....explanation?....
I just broke into my house with a butter knife. It kinda scares me just how easy that was.
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