Different chick, same blowjob, same parking lot.
Woke up to a denim duvet cover this morning... why r guys so tacky?
really keith? you showed me your dick and your not gonna text me back
All I saw was a beagle come across the screen and explain the theory of relativity to me and leave
23 Theme Park Employees Confess The Biggest Adult Tantrums They’ve Witnessed
EW EW EW EW THAT PENIS BELONGS TO SOMEONE'S FATHER! THAT PENIS BELONGS TO OUR FRIEND'S FATHER! THAT PENIS HELPED CREATE OUR FRIEND! YOU'RE NOT ALLOWED TO ADMIRE IT!
We have a drunken confused pantless man in our apt. Boots.
I'm naked in the window of the hotel and I feel like I'm walking in slow motion like a robot
We told you to stay put for 2 minutes. We come back out and your being handcuffed yelling "DO YOU FEEL LIKE A GOOD FUCKING PERSON ARRESTING ME ON MY BIRTHDAY?!"
There are pre-booty call contracts for a reason. I have no intention of calling you tomorrow.
Do you need my fax number or something?
23 Crazy Psychological Tricks You Have To Try on Someone RIGHT NOW
So fucking hammered. Is this all spelled right? I'm holding it up to my eye. I am on a boulder. I feel like an owl
if you fuck our toilet off the wall again, i'm going to be so mad.
yeah I had to wear a fucking diaper from work home so I didn't get the shitty squirts all over my cars seats it was fucked
should we try and roll a cross joint since its good friday? you know, for jesus
WHO GIVES HANDJOBS AT 8 IN THE FUCKING MORNING
He literally said from now on he's always banging chicks with asthma becuas it's such an ego booster