all adderall does is make me the grand champion of using wikipedia.
you started crying because you didn't get to wear your rainboots this week so i turned on the shower and let you jump around in it
youre the best friend ever
Just saw the first guy I gave head to lose in the french open...some how I feel better that my mistake made it to the same mistake as our relationship, the third round. Don't judge.
I've reached the slutty point of no return. And it feels like multiple orgasms and coke lines
The lady at Walgreens was all excited my pregnancy tests had a coupon.
Just like to put it out there it's surprising how little reception a dog cage has
But in fairness, I would totally have a robo-penis as long as it had full sensation.
Is it appropriate to send an apology gift to his roommates for breaking the bathroom sink during crazy sex?
i just want to die with dignity and clean teeth, is that too much to ask?
Am I required to send a Christmas card to my fuck buddy?
how early is too early to start drinking over the gilmore girls revival
So he has moved up to a stage 5 clinger...Surprised he didn't try to lure you into bed with tacos, like he did last time
Yeah... akward. I don't want a round 2
I'm pretty sure my therapist gave me the green light to fuck him.
I got so drunk last night that I was drunk in my dream. Good night
long story short, he tried to fuck me standing up, toppled over, and now I have four stitches next to my eye
Randomize
