made out with the bouncer to distract him from how illegitimate my fake id is.
help help how do i get him away from me should i talk in a robot voice or something
Baconater + red wine = first meal of the day
Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
Yeah. Fortunately, the road to Hell is paved with naked 21 year old girls.
Which beats the fuck out of good intentions.
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
i wish we had morning classes together so we can spike our coffee.
You said you couldnt get the condom on but "its the thought that counts"
I'm sorry i ruined our friendship with a boner
As yoda would say; A bitch, she is.
I've been eating like all day, let me suffer my one 'Dear lord, I'm the size of a small whale. One that doesn't even need to find being killed by illegal whaling because I'm not even big enough to provide an decent blubber, but still big enough to be considered for a brief moment.' moment in peace.
Caprisun cuts tequila surprisingly well...
Instead of saying hi she asked if she could touch your dick through your ski bib and NOW I understand why you wore it to the bars
Guy just walked in with a 40 and a Honda steering wheel. Where the fuck am I?
at the time fanning him with a dish tray seemed like a good idea but when we found it buried in the dirt the next morning i questioned our judgement. needless to say he still threw up even with the extra breeze.
Randomize
