Yeah...you.wanna.hang.out.tomorrow?My.space.button.is.broken.
I think I just saw the travelocity gnome in leather chaps.
he just stuck his car key in my belly button, made car starting noises and pretended like i was revving my engine?
She threw up everywhere and is crying about a fictional character who died on Grey's Anatomy
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I love reading their "i love you more" , "no i love you more" war on facebook today knowing that he hooked up with me last night. I bet i know who wins that one.
Just saw a dude hanging out a window upside down chugging a 60 of vodka. This weekend is big for everyone I guess
I'm sitting on the toilet just to avoid my bosses look of disapproval
i repeatedly had to ask him if he was into this because he kept talking about random things while i jerked him off. i got annoyed and in order to annoy him back, i told him i wanted to watch him do it. he also talked about basketball WHILE cumming. NEVER AGAIN.
Text me all the things you want us to do this summer. So far, I have Kegstand written down
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just found glitter from our Father's Day party on my balls this morning.
DAD WTF
I'm really tired of this guy walking his chicken in my neighborhood.
I had fresh baked oatmeal cookies, tacos AND was on deck to give a stellar blow job. You'd think that'd be a win/win/win situation.
We need to get me chipped asap
I'm cuddly bitch. Deal with it.
I just bought a bottle of dried bees on Etsy. I am the wrong person to talk you out of this.
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