1 of the best things of being a business owner is I don't get fired for having sex in the office
Wow, this guy is harder to get rid of than gum in pubic hair
sometimes i wish i could just stick a turkey baster up there and suck out the blood
similar to the time we made up the game of screaming at the top of our lungs any time a guy any of us slept with walked into the party. that went over SO well.
So I just learned that my father was teaching me rules for drinking games when I was 5.
I'll report later on the progress of the mountain orgy
I want to be ashamed of the things we do this weekend
We've been walking through the woods for two hours, he just keeps taking pictures. At least we'll remember this tomorrow.
hes fine. but he did fall asleep while tebowing and started snoring
Just fucked up my mustache shaving, gonna have to take it off because now it makes me look like a pedophile
FYI your old mustache made you look like a pedophile
What if he turns back to me, finds me seemingly fondling my breasts, and thinks I'm turned on by eagles?
He says we're "annoying" but that's an odd word to describe a couple of heroic liquor saiyans
Please let me buy the coffee, all my assets are in starbucks gift cards
Dead. I am actually dead. Also, worst nightmare confirmed: throwing up in a four hundred person lecture.
Dont worry, the Canadians are more afraid of you then you are of them.
Randomize
