You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
I just found a frying pan...in my bed.
Nice. Sry i missed. Also sorry that i pissed on my toothbrush last nite
Sink seemed easy target but balance was no good
he fingered my asshole thinking it was my vag...I couldn't bring myself to tell him, mostly from shame for me and pity for him
he said i was the most charming throwing up drunk person hes ever taken care of. so of course i had sex with him.
You do realize that we bought beer at 9:30 in the morning to avoid sobering up. Stupidity was bound to follow.
So I've discovered that being hungover at 25 feels the same as being hungover at 24. Happy Birthday to me.
She loves introducing her friends to my foreskin.
I wish I saved his nudes so I could anonymously submit them to his tumblr
This summer has already been like the best summer ever. FREEDOM IS AWESOME. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND GOD BLESS THE SINGLE LIFE.
I peed outside 4 times after the bar, safe to say I had great night
I'm just gonna back away slowly and come back when there's less weird crap.
I made out with 4 out of 4 girls I was out with last night, I'm pretty sure everyone knows I'm a lesbian by now
Being forward is somethimes a problems. Like in sexual deity Kong.
I think you’re losing coherence.
I am
and then she sorta stared at me like "holy shit" and I looked down and my dog was licking her ass
Ruff night.
Randomize
