The is a pregnant woman in this Chipolte wearing a shirt that simply says ‘OOPS!’ across the tummy.
That baby is bound to be under-loved.
Just got roadhead in a driving snowstorm. That shit should be a Winter X games event.
I told him I wanted to have sex to "halleluiah", he suggested the poke-rap.
He just yelled in the bar, "So I stuck it in two girls butts, why are you bringing that up now?"
at least if we puke, we will be surrounded by beautiful, non-judgemental trees.
Hahaha wear something that says i'm here to party but wont go farther then a handjob.
Just cause I'm shitfaced wasted every night waking up in random beds all over Manhattan does not mean I'm a mess.
Truth. Respect the hustle.
It is completely possible to eat beef jerky sexually.
with hottub sex, handcuffs, Pocahontas themed lap dances, and eating pumpkin pie off each other, I'm gonna say thanksgiving will be a success ;)
I'm driving home wearing one sock, boxers, and a tee shirt. That's how good it was
22 is way too old to still be having "thank god I think I'm getting my period" days
I've decided to have sex with him one more time to make sure I don't like him
I should probably eat a Plan B. Pill for breakfast. Happy Halloween.
I need to learn how to not be a fucking liability
Btw that $18 I gave you to run around outside naked came out of your wallet.
Randomize
