at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
i'm home, then i'll come over
ightttt gangstaaaaaaaaaaaa
nvm.
Oh i forgot. I hit on a mentally challenged girl too.
Apparently I fed my Plan B to my turtle last night.
All I remember is taking a bath, puking in the bath water numerous times while trying to wash myself and I must of eventually given up
Like I said I'm looking on the bright side. The bright side just happens to be filled with penis attached to hot marines
Your place is a magnet for either righteous parties or crippling alcohol dependency. Lets find out which together
There is nothing more demoralizing than exchanging 150 dollar Christmas gifts with a girl your not sleeping with
And then we made hashbrowns with vodka and queso.
After my date left I rallied and took the Asian girl home. Flexibility my friend.
She got the hiccups while deep throating me. It was epic. Once in a lifetime experience.
He didn't get laid that weekend.. and that is honestly an accomplishment for the rest of us.
You'll never fully grasp an awkward walk of shame until you run into his mom while you're trying to sneak out. Then to make matters worse you have to ask her to mover car because it's blocking you in.
and I lost my effing shirt.
He took a shot of vodka and AND ATE ME OUT AS A CHASER. YESSS. I AM IN LOVE.
Feel free to drag me back to reality at your convenience
Randomize
