4:12a: just got back to his place now. I don't want to talk about it
Did you go home with that guy without me?
Sorry boo - it's pouring and I found a boy with a car
I just found 51 cents in my bed. Did you leave me a tip?
Some girl just asked us for directions back to campus. we told her to take the first four lefts. We live on a block. she believed us
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When we found you, you were using the bottle of Captain as a pillow...with a note on your forehead that said don't wake up the champion.
underwater hpnotiq shots? sure why not.
I have a theory that years from now they will be with women who despise me because of what I trained their husbands to like.
Nothing kills the mood like him going to slap my ass and he hits his balls at the same time
MY INSIDES ARE BASICALLY BEING WRUNG BY A CHAINSAW IM NEVER TAKING PLAN B AGAIN
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just want you to know when I bang him in the back of my car later I'll have pony by ginuwine on repeat
why do i have a pole dance champion shot glass?
Getting high with your mom, but thinking of you!
nyquil+orgasm=very intense and oddly interesting
girls shouldnt black out with american flag bandaids on their nips
You know your life has gone off the rails when waking up in a Spanish hospital with alcohol poisoning and no memory of how you got there is not even your top wildest drinking story.
Randomize