Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
I never thought I would get head to the lion king soundtrack
My face is bruised from laying on the concrete. NO MORE VODKA!
Why are you seriouly talking to me about this when there naked pics of blake lively on the internet? Priorities man...
Don't patronize me, I thought of that on peyote, so it was basically like a message from God.
Like, she can be the shepard of the gays. Delivering him unto homosexuality.
Drunk you decided to patrol campus as the Arrow and tell random bystanders "YOU HAVE FAILED THIS CAMPUS." Campus P.D. did not join your crusade.
That explains the nerd bow & arrow...
I don't think it counts as a booty call at 6:30 pm.
You are ridiculously similar to a unicorn, and I want to fuck that unicorn.
So help me God.... if he sends me a dick pic.... I will make it so he has to eat food through a tube in his nose and poop into a bag by his belly button
My chance to home wreck was right in front of me and I didn’t grab it by the balls
How do I word.. " hey, I need you to fuck me really hard and see if you or I can feel my birth control. No worries, this is just an experiment." In a nice way without them feeling used.
Dear Ex-Sister-in-Law, I never thought I would say this, but I just found your panties in my back seat. Please remind me to give them back.
Vulcans are sexy now IT HAS BEEN WAY TOO LONG SINCE I'VE GOTTEN LAID
....even the bartender was embarrassed for her
Randomize
