Yeah no shit. My mom is giving me winecoolers as we watch a show abt alcoholics
He belongs with you like a mcdonalds playground belongs in Chernobyl
i am not above fucking your little sister on your bed
.....so he has a son. Josh. That is not his roommate
How could you not be happy? Its like "and then I found 5 dollars" but "and then I found a handle of vodka"
so jimmy johns showed up at our party last night. our house is sponsored now. living the dream.
Can you explain to me how i got kicked out of a bar last night, from outside the bar?
Quick question, when did I develop feelings, and how can I make them go away?
That's two questions.
I wish I could but I can't. No beer pong or sex on a hammock...such an unproductive weekend
They are fixing my bike for free, trying to smoke me out, and their kids keep hugging me.
I went to bed at ten on a Friday night I have virtues to spare
It's 10:15 on a Wednesday night and my dick is covered in pop rocks. How's your Wednesday going?
Need to find a Santa hat to fit my penis, he deserves to be festive too.
Is it illegal to hookup with your fathers god child?
And speaking of good acting I may have a sex tape now
Randomize
