I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
i think my mom watched the whole time
OMFG BINX FROM HOCUS POCUS IS MCGEE IN NCIS!!!!!!!! most. epic. realization. ever.
just smoked a blunt while listening to nsync. i now know what my childhood was missing.
Just think about it this way, every time you work Sunday, it's another $75 and that equals another hooker when we go to Amsterdam.
These days, you and me are swimming in dicks.
Marco
Polo
In this town being related to a brewing family or the owner of a sports team is like being royalty. It's like hooking up with the queen's nephew or something.
she's a nursing student, i didn't think vomit would freak her out so much
you puked ON HER
No foreplay. Missionary. Too quick. And he owns a fedora.
I almost fell asleep reading that.
I almost fell asleep fucking it.
Literally too hungover to pull out of the driveway. Tried 3 times and failed. I'm going back to bed.
I honestly didn't think living in Canada would change me, until I found myself watching hockey porn
Tears For Fears is the only thing getting me through life at this moment.
The married guy I've been fucking broke it off because I'm not a trump supporter and don't share his "traditional values".
One minute I'm going home the next I'm getting railed on the back 9.
Try to fuck my roomie AND steal my slippers: you are no longer my favorite cousin.
Randomize
